Tag: Love

Wedding Bells

Wedding Bells

by TheSecretLifeOfPandas ♥ 6 Comments

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I wrote my maid of honor speech the night of the rehearsal dinner in a drunken fit of emotion. I figured I’d share since I haven’t posted in a while due to wedding stuff.

*the following is a little different from what I said because I was trying not to cry and I added things*

“ I spent a lot of time thinking about what I wanted to say here tonight.

Not because I find it difficult to speak about my love for Megan or the joy that I have, now that she has her Carls, but because I wanted  desperately to make sure I found the right words.

Megan and I have been friends since freshman year of high school. Which at this point is more than half of our lives. She found my peanut in seventh period biology and what can I say, I fell for the girl in the baggy pants and band t-shirts. I could write a book about our friendship, call it the adventures of beans and crackers–I’m beans, she’s crackers. It’s our karaoke stage name. It’s a thing.

But I’ve only been allotted a few minutes so I’ll reign it in.

I’m not one to be stuck in the past or spend my time trying to relive the “glory days” of my high school experience but without those crazy days I wouldn’t have found Megan. God bless the administration that seemed to think Megan and I should have nearly every single class together for four years. But man why did our math teachers ask have to suck?

We’ve been through a lot together, making it through the craziness of our teenage years, the misadventures of trying to figure out how to be grown ups in our 20s, Megan have you figured it out yet? Because I’m still having trouble adulting. Being there for each other for more than just the late night giggle fests. For the hard times too.

And now here you are taking that next step in your life.

I remember when I met Carl, I new immediately that I liked this guy. And I was actually really excited you’d finally found someone who was taller than you in heels.

Carl, the more I’ve gotten to know you the more I come to love you as well. I’m pretty sure I can speak for all of Megan’s friends, as we’ve discussed you a lot over the past few years, you see we had to make sure you were suitable for our girl, and we’ve come to realize that you’re a keeper. and I couldn’t be happier that you are the lucky man who gets to say forever to our Megan.

Take care of our girl, Carl, not enough people realize how special she is. I’m glad you did.

Meg, ni shi wo de ai ren. Wo ai ni. (You are my love person*. I love you.)

To Megan and Carl and a lifetime full of happiness and love.

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*ai ren or love person is an antiquated term of endearment in Chinese. We heard that term in our Chinese class and loved it. However Lu Lao shi, our Chinese teacher would get grumpy when we would use it because it was so old fashioned to her. Naturally that made us use it more.)

Changes

Changes

by TheSecretLifeOfPandas ♥ 12 Comments

I never pictured a future in which you and I didn’t exist.

You are still you.

And I am still me.

But you are you living in a world without me.

And I am existing in a world without you.

A world made dark and unbearable by the loss of you.

Oh bla di.

Oh bla da.

Life goes on…

People change.

You changed into a person who didn’t want me and I slowly let myself fade away.

Distance

Distance

by TheSecretLifeOfPandas ♥ 6 Comments

She waited impatiently for the text she was scared would never come, fighting sleep in the hopes that he hadn’t fallen asleep and forgotten about her.

“Maybe he’s over you.”

No. She couldn’t think that. He loved her. He said so. He couldn’t be so cruel as to forget to say goodnight to her.

“When was the last time he did that?”

It’d been a while. She just assumed that since they’d been talking for such a long time he’d fallen out of the habit. But she’d texted him first. Hoping he would at least smile and reply.

“He won’t.”

The small voice in the back of her mind had slowly gotten louder in the past year. And his voice and his interest had slowly diminished.

They were drifting apart, and she wasn’t ready for what that could mean.

She set her phone on the nightstand and let sleep overcome her.

Flesh

Flesh

by TheSecretLifeOfPandas ♥ 20 Comments

I wake up to the sensation of your fingers lightly tracing circles on my hip. I feel the warmth of your breath on my neck and press back against you as I stretch and yawn.

It’s only just past dawn and the soft light streams through the open windows.

“Good morning, handsome.”

“Good morning, beautiful.”

You nuzzle my neck and I giggle. Your beard tickles me like it always does and I sigh with contentment.

Mornings and you.

The warmth of your flesh against mine.

The smell of your skin which lingers even after you leave me for another day of work.

“I wasn’t sure when you were waking up. And I didn’t want to wake you up the way I did last time. I ended up with a knee to the face.” You laugh and I groaned. I remembered the looks people would give us. Walking in the park, you me and Butch-Cassidy, the tall tattooed bearded man with the pink haired little princess and the golden retriever. You looked like you’d just gotten out of a bar fight when in reality your girlfriend has really good reflexes.

“I’m sorry. You know how ticklish I am. It was just a reaction. I made it up to you didn’t I?” You growl in my ear before positioning yourself above me.

“Yes you did. It made the black eye worth it.” You lean down to kiss me, laughter in your mouth as your tongue parts my lips.

I live for your kisses.

I live for your touch.

You pull away and I sigh again.

“I told my team that my lover beats me, but I like the abuse.”

“Shut up.” I smack your chest.

“See? It’s only six am and you’re already hitting me. I love it.” You kiss me again. Harder. Giving my lip a little bite as you kiss your way down my chin, my neck and down to my chest. I close my eyes hoping you’re going to continue moving your lips further down my body.

“My God, you have the most beautiful breasts I’ve ever seen.” You tell me before gently taking my nipple into your mouth.

I gasped as you suck and lick. “Oh stop.” I moan.

You look up at me, confused. “You want me to stop?”

I opened my eyes. “Oh no. Please don’t stop that. I meant stop saying ridiculous things.” I felt myself turning red. “My breasts are not the most beautiful breasts you’ve ever seen. They’re just normal boobs.”

“Calling your breasts normal, is blasphemous. Never say those words again.” I laugh. “Your boobs are perfect and beautiful and I’m the lucky bastard that gets to play with them whenever I want. Like this.” You press your face between my breasts and blow bubbles as I laugh and push you away.

“Ok ok! I get it.” We both laugh. I reach up and trace the outline of your lips.

You look down at me and I watch the laughter in your eyes fade as it’s replaced with desire and lust. I can feel you hard against me and I spread my legs for you.

“Fuck, you’re sexy.” You kiss me again and I reach for your cock. I stroke you as your tongue explores my mouth, little moans escaping my lips and yours

You reach for my hand and hold it above my head, our fingers intertwined as you guide your cock between my lips. You gently cup my cheek before sliding inside of me.

You moan and close your eyes as the length of you fills me. I wrap my legs around you. Pulling you closer to me, holding you inside me.

You open your eyes and smile at me as you pull out and thrust back into me.

Your rhythm is slow and steady. Sleepy and unrushed. I reached up and wrap my arms around your neck as you move in and out of me.

“Why do you feel so good?” I gasped.

“Why do you?” You reply. Leaning down you kiss my neck, lightly sucking as you pick up speed.

I dig my nails into your back.

“Harder.” I moan.

You smirk. And start slamming your thick cock inside of me harder and harder. I drag my nails down your back and scream as you start pounding my pussy.

“Oh fuck!”

You laugh and shush me. “You’ll wake the neighbors.”

I don’t give a fuck about the neighbors. All I care about is you and me. Your skin against my skin.
Your lips wandering from my lips to my neck to my breasts.

“Fuck the neighbors.” I cry out.

You give my neck a little bite. “I could, but I don’t think they’ll be as fun as you.”

I slide my hands down to your ass and give it a hard smack.

“Ouch!” You cry out and you thrust hard inside of me.

“Ah!” I cry out. “Do it again.”

“You first.”

I giggle as I feel my orgasm start building.

“Oh fuck, babe don’t stop. I’m gonna come.” I throw my head back and close my eyes as I grip your back.

You grab a fistful of my hair and pull my face towards yours. “Look at me.” You order.

I open my eyes and look up at your blue grey ones. My breath coming fast and short as waves of pleasure run over my body. I moan your name as I reach my peak.

You lean down and kiss me hard and start fucking me faster. I can feel the urgency in your kiss. You’re almost there.

We part lips. “Come for me.” I whisper.

“Fuck.”

You move my legs over your shoulders and enter me deeper and harder with every thrust.

I feel another orgasm building.

You kiss my leg and groan and I feel you finish inside me.

You put my legs down and sigh as you softly slide in and out of me, filling me with every drop of your warm come.

You look down at me and stroke my face while your other hand moves down between my thighs, gently rubbing my clit.

“Ohh…” I whimper, already close to the edge I come again with you still inside me.

“Good girl.” You pull out of me and give your fingers a lick before kissing me again. You rest your weight on me briefly before laying next to me.

I curl up on your chest. My fingers playing with your chest hair as you wrap your arm around me.

“You make it very hard to leave in the mornings.” You say as you twirl my hair around you finger.

“You make it hard to be by myself all day.” I mumble.

We lay like that for a few moments before his alarm goes off. He kisses my forehead before getting out of bed.

“Wake me before you leave.” I tell him.

“Of course.” He gives my breast a squeeze and chuckles as he walks to the bathroom.

I smile and wrap myself in our blankets and turn towards the windows.

I drift off with the warmth of the morning sun on my face.

Bone Fragments

Bone Fragments

by TheSecretLifeOfPandas ♥ 4 Comments

I was shattered.

Millions of pieces of myself were spread out far and wide– quirks and habits and ideas now merely flotsam in a sea of self-doubt.

He had taken everything that I was and corrupted it.

He’d made me a weaker version of myself; a distorted version of myself I didn’t recognize.

I was never enough.

And then without a word without a warning he was gone. After making his way into the far recesses of my fragile heart he disappeared.

He left me. A broken China doll that he was done playing with.

When you don’t know who you are, how can you put yourself back together again?

What do you do when there are too many fragments of bone and skin and laughter that don’t fit together anymore?

What becomes of a puzzle with too many missing pieces?

I wanted to let myself disappear– to let myself be absorbed into the atmosphere and become nothing.

I wanted every piece of me that he’d ever touched, every dream I’d ever whispered to him, every emotion he ever elicited, to be destroyed forever.

But matter cannot be created or destroyed.

You can never stop being.

There are traces of you in everything you’ve touched.

My words were still flying in the wind, the trees are full of, “Remember that one time…” And sassy little quips.

And I remembered that even something beautiful can be created out broken pieces of glass.

And bit by bit I’m piecing myself together again. A colorful mosaic, whose design is ever changing.

I am being made new.